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Friday, 10 January 2014

But when I put the batteries in it by Muna P3

Jane loved boys. Her dad gave her toys and one was a toy lion. The lion needed two batteries so she put the batteries in it. The toy lion talked to me. The lion said, "hellow Jane. Jane was surprised. Her parents didn't believe her. She told her friends. Her friends said, what a cool toy"But her friend didn't believed her. She was sad that nobody believed her.

2 comments:

Sandra Fine said...

Hi Muna
I like your idea of the batteries making the lion talk - what an amazing toy! I also like how you have used a repeating pattern in your writing - you told your parents, they didn't believe you, you told your friends, they didn't believe you. This is a powerful way of building up a story. Well done.

Sandra Fine said...

Hi Muna
I like your idea of the batteries making the lion talk - what an amazing toy! I also like how you have used a repeating pattern in your writing - you told your parents, they didn't believe you, you told your friends, they didn't believe you. This is a powerful way of building up a story. Well done.